Musings of a healing heart #2

Accept that you are not okay right now. Accept that you aren’t yet ready to rise after such a nasty fall.

Accept that you need to work and take care of yourself. That these clouds won’t loom over your head forever and a bright, golden sunshine is waiting for you.

Accept your fears and fight them.

Accept and not deny. Denial will only lead you to fall into the deeper pit, in darkness and clawing your way back in will be painstaking.

And if you really want to deny something, deny giving up.

Acceptance opens the door towards healing whereas Denial is a barrier to it.

PS: This title thing is really getting too difficult for me

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I hope

I hope you realise how beautiful you are. And with beautiful, I don’t mean your looks, but your soul. Your kind, loving, courageous and a selfless soul.

I hope you look beyond your flaws and blemishes. I hope you notice the virtues that you own, the virtues that make you a better human being.

I hope you understand how life is not supposed to be easy. It will give you moments of sheer joy and happiness, but it will also give you the thrills, the tears, the setbacks.

I hope you try to find peace and not just by meditating. Find peace in watching the sunrise and sunset, peace in the innocent smile of a baby, a sight of two people in love or just by sitting at the coffee shop, reading your favourite book.

I hope you calm down and relax. I hope you cut yourself from the shackles of a daily routine and do what you always wanted to.

Go partying at night with your best friends, plan a small trip, go to an unknown destination, meet new people.

I hope you fall in love. Fall in love with yourself, the scars, the vices, the real unfiltered you.

I just hope, you fall in love with your life.

PS: I guess my posts have become a bit repetitive.

The Strongest

I am re-reading books that meant nothing to me a few years ago. I am listening to songs that I don’t even like. The day begins with a heaviness and the nights seem a little too longer. I have a corner in the house for myself and my solitude.

My dingy and craziest thoughts that would otherwise give me shivers of pain, find a solace in that corner. My mother says, I am her strongest child. The more sorted one.

Probably, she hasn’t been able to venture into my darkest places and look there. I feel sad for her, as she is in an illusion that her daughter cannot break easily.

But mom, the truth is, I am already shattered and falling into pieces. And I struggling to out them back again in places.

Yet, I am living. Courageously and with head held high. Because, you survived this way all your life. You never let the boat of your strength capsize into the ocean of those who depised you.

Yes, I am okay. I’ll fight. I’ll survive. As I am your daughter. Exactly your shadow.

Seventh letter

Last night, I was watching ‘The Notebook’. I’ve always loved the movie and never missed a chance to catch up on it. Suddenly, I remembered how you hated it.

Not just one, you disliked all the hardcore romantic movies I used to watch. Still, you always sat down beside me.

I realised how you never tried to make me feel that you are tied down or stuck. Rather you’d smile along with me the whole time. I wonder how many times you’ve ditched your own feelings to not hurt mine.

How many times you gave up your happiness to wipe my tears away? With these thoughts rioting in my mind, my heart ached with sadness. Sadness for you. Sadness for us.

And then, I switched off the movie. Instead, I watched the one you loved. Till the end. I bet at that moment, I saw you smile. Real.

This new year

This new year, fall in love. Not necessarily with someone else but with your own damn self. Treat yourself with pizzas and ice-creams. Spend a cozy afternoon relaxing in your couch while you watch your favourite movie.

This new year, be braver. Brave enough to take some of the risks that can do wonders for you. Brave enough to walk away from things that give you nothing but pain. Brace enough to accept challenges that drag you out of your comfort zone.

This new year, learn to let go. Let go if anything doesn’t work for you. Let go the chances that you feel isn’t right. Let go the bitter memories of the previous year and all the years before that.

This new year, take a stand. Take a stand for the ones closest to your heart, ones who mean the world to you. Take a stand for love, peace and kindness. Also, take a stand for you.

This new year, heal. Heal the scars that adorn your body like the war marks. Wake up everyday with a motive to heal a little by little. Cleanse your mind with the thoughts that killed you.

This new year, forgive. Forgive the ones who promised to stay forever but ended up breaking everything, even you into pieces. Forgive, because at least for some time you have loved them with all your heart and they loved you back.

Most of all, forgive yourself. Forgive yourself for inflicting some much pain on your innocent soul that otherwise always deserves peace.

Ps: Last new year post, I promise 😄

A Thank You note

I am not going to bore you with the highlights of this year or my so called ‘top moments’. I am just here, to write a thank you note to everyone of you. Here it goes:

Thank you for being a part of my life and motivating me to be better everyday. The ones who read my blogs, like and comment, you guys have made this year extraordinary for me. Your constant support keeps me going.

Thank you for being such a wonderful audience, over looking my flaws and accepting me as a writer. Thank you for making me feel worthy, that even I am capable. I hope you continue to extend your warm support in the coming years as well. I am excitingly looking forward to new challenges and finding my foothold.

Once again, Thank you.

Wishing you a very Happy New Year. Have a marvellous year ahead.