12 promises

2017 is almost coming to an end. 2018 is just at our doorstep and so, I want you to make 12 promises to yourself.

1. You will spend a little more time with the nature. Stop and breathe the fragrance of the lovely flowers. Admire their beauty.

2. You will read more and more books. If you love them, then re-read.

3. You will try to put yourself ahead of others and trust me, that’s not at all selfish.

4. You will not neglect your mistakes and instead learn from them.

5. You will smile more. Help those in need. Be kind

6. Be courageous.

7. You will not allow toxic people to stay in your life and if they don’t leave, walk away.

8. You will love every part of yourself whether whole or broken.

9. You will live the little moments of life because all small things are not really unimportant.

10. You will take care of the ones who stood by your side like a rock.

11. Most of all you will take care of yourself. It’s okay to have a break down and not being able to stand on your feet again. At those times, help yourself.

12. Lastly, you will embrace this new year with open arms. Happily. Ready to explore new challenges

Advertisements

Warrior

I say

You broke,
You mended yourself,
You are a warrior.

It takes a lot of
courage, to carry your
own shattered pieces,
everyday and everywhere
you go, never letting
the world know about it.

It’s not easy,
to spend insomniac nights,
and still get out of the
bed in the morning.

Cheers to all those days,
when you wanted to give up,
but didn’t.

Cheers to all those days,
when you wrapped your
arms around yourself and
said, ‘Be brave’

Trust me,
You are brave.
You are the mirror
to everyone who is
hurting out there.

I say again,
You broke,
You mended yourself,
You survived
Yes, you are a WARRIOR

Sixth letter

Dear You,

I keep writing poems for you, stories of us living in a fairy tale. I write letters to you all day long, of which words look empty, sad and desolate.

Sometimes, it feels like they would die of so much of sadness in them.

My sister wants to read the poems and letters but I won’t let her. She insists, but still I won’t let her touch any. I’ve started liking the colour blue more. Because that’s what I feel most of the day now.

When the darkness creeps in it becomes strangely calmer. At night, I give up the weight of the world on my shoulders and sleep peacefully.

And then I dream of you, where we are still together, our eyes never leaving the sight of each other. Not even once. Where I try to give at least half of the love that you give me, that I didn’t do for real.

I try to not hurt you, like I did for real.

Love,

Me

Not your year.

Maybe this wasn’t supposed to be your year. Maybe you expected a little too much. Your experience was completely in contrast with what you had initially planned.

But it should not stop you from taking further chances. It should not become a barrier between you and your aspirations.

It should not turn you into a silent spectator in the face of any adversities. And it should also not stop you from bouncing back after every setback.

One bad year, doesn’t mean a waste. One bad year doesn’t mean the end of the world.

Try to let go the heartbreaks, the negativity but keep all the lessons that you have learnt in the process. Keep the moments that according to you were the best ones. Even the littlest of them counts.

Blow away the sadness of the craziest ten months where you were struggling to find your foothold. Keep the two months with you, where you started feeling the air, when you found your happy place.

Appreciate yourself. You’ve tried enough to make this year as yours and one day, you will certainly do it. Trust me.

Fifth letter

Dear You,

I hope you find someone who acknowledges that how a beautiful human you are. Someone who doesn’t overlooks your virtues and express disgust at your flaws.

Someone who accept your imperfect self with open arms.

I hope you find someone who wakes up everyday, happy and excited to meet you after a long long night. Someone who constantly reminds you that you are loved.

I hope you find someone who moves heaven and earth to just be with you. Someone who takes pride in having you.

Someone who doesn’t shy away to introduce you to their friends and family, as their better half.

I hope you find someone who is ready to lend you a shoulder whenever you feel like crying and surrendering all your vulnerabilities.

I hope you find someone who heals your wounded areas and not hurt them more.

I hope you find someone who loves you with all their heart. Someone who makes up for the hard time that I gave you. And someone, who isn’t me.

Love,

Me

Fourth letter

Dear You,

When I was 10, everyday I used to look out of my window at the sky. It was always blue, sometimes covered with a fog of clouds. Especially, I loved the colours of sunsets.

At night I counted the sheet of stars and watched the airplanes flying by. To me, they were shooting stars. It was my own little Universe.

But then, some people erected massive structures right in front of my window, taller, almost touching the sky.

I could no longer see the floating clouds or the airplanes passing through them. I couldn’t see the moon changing it’s phases with grace.

I think that’s what I did with myself too. I built a wall on all my sides, barring everyone to come in. I was used to the darkness, always.

I know if I had let you in, you would have dragged me into the light but the idea of scanning the sky with those stars again, scared me. I was scared that it will all be taken away from me again.

So, I decided to be that kid behind the window forever. And I am happy that you let me go.

Love,

Me

Lessons from tough times

Tough times teach us a lot of things. They teach us to be braver than our usual self, ready to take on any situation that life throws on our path.

They teach us to be more fearless, not shying away to face even our biggest fear and overcome them. Tough times make us stronger, that we could ever think of. So stronger, that we may even surprise ourself with our will to rise above everything.

They teach us to gather our scattered pieces one by one. They teach us to mould ourselves . Tough times teach us to never leave our own side.

They bring us closer to the people who actually care about us and want to see us smiling. They pull off the masks of those who were just acting out. Tough times saves us from further heartbreak.

They teach us to pick up ourselves when we stumble and to bandage our own wounds. Tough times teach us to show our scars to the world, because they are the proof of our courageous self.

Tough times teach us to rise again from the still burning ashes and to fight like a soldier. Most of all, tough times teach us to live in the little moments of life.

Find comfort in the small things and absorb all the happiness that comes our way.

Most of all tough times teachus to love ourselves like nobody else can.

Musings of a braver self

Many a times I feel that, I should just stop expecting too much and let go everything that has kept me stranded for so long. Let go everything that has been sucking the remaining strength out of me.

I think of all the people who were a part of my life. Some of them taught me really great lessons. Real. Eye-opener. But I miss a few. And it’s difficult to let them go.

I look around my big room. It seems empty. I don’t know, if that’s me actually empty. There’s a painting of a young girl sitting by the river in a pensive mood, hanging on the wall.

Then there’s a picture of Merilyn Monroe posing in her elegant self, her eyes mysterious as ever. There’s my mother too, with a calm demeanor and an enchanting smile but a heart of lioness, the woman I admire the most.

At the end of the day, one person who remains is me. Not the ones who walked away or the ones who stayed back. Whole and soul me.

For my sake, I always find the strength against any more ravenous storms, protecting my wrecked places. I know I have to save myself at any cost. So I let go, a little everyday.

Apology

Dear You,

The day you walked away, I realised what it feels to be on the side of heartbreak. Because, it was always me who broke your heart. Your kind and golden heart.

It was me who would laugh at your romantic gestures. It was me who would get sick of your constant ‘I love you’s. I never tried to look into your eyes and find that your love for me was everywhere in them.

And now, I want to apologise. For everything. I apologise for all the moments, I made you feel unworthy for me.

I apologise for not replying to all your ‘are you mad at me’ texts.

I apologise for all the times I said that you weren’t enough.

I apologise for all the days, I made excuses to not be with you. I apologise for all the nights you went to bed thinking, ‘do I really matter?’

They’d always say, you don’t really understand the value of anything until it’s lost. Now I know, what they actually meant.

I apologise. And I want nothing but forgiveness.

Maybe yours,

Me